“Be very careful never to forget what
you have seen God doing for you.
May His miracles have a deep and permanent effect upon your life! Tell
your children and your grandchildren about the glorious miracles He did.”
Deuteronomy 4:9 TLB
To my precious family,
God has blessed me with 57 years of joy as a wife, mother and nana.
He is so good. :) I wanted to record my story of miracles for you, because I
want you to know how much Jesus loves you. My greatest desire is for you to love him right back. Forever!
Looking back at my life, I thought I was somewhat “religious.” I went to church fairly often, but I
didn't have a relationship with Jesus Christ, and I only prayed when I really
wanted something. When I was 20, I
was diagnosed with cancer. I had
to drop out of college for surgery, followed by several rounds of intensive
cobalt radiation treatments that nearly killed me. I felt sure that I could beat it, and I didn't think God
would let me down. Eight months
after being diagnosed with cancer, I married Don, my high school sweetheart,
who stayed by my side through it all, despite doctors' predictions that I
wouldn't live a long life.
God granted me a miracle, healing me from Hodgkin's disease. We
thought that all the sickness was behind us. But, three years later, the day of
my college graduation, I was told the cancer had returned. I was shocked,
because I didn't think a bad thing could happen to me twice. I was full of anger. I struggled through my first year of
teaching, receiving chemo every other weekend. The worst news came when those
treatments ended, and doctors told us we would probably be unable to have
children.
At that point, I was raging mad at God!
Then, two years later, God blessed us with our miracle baby,
Kimberly. I was so happy, I “forgave
God” for putting me through so much.
We couldn't believe it when 11 months later, we were told that Kim was
totally deaf. She would never hear
us speak. She would have to attend
special classes and use sign language her whole life. At that moment, I hardened my heart and shut God out of my
life. For five years, I let that
anger toward God grow in me and missed out on the comfort and joy He wanted to
give me. Still, He was
faithful. He brought people into
our lives that helped Kim to use hearing aids and to speak. Then, he blessed us with two more
miracles – our twins, Lindsey and Michael!
Because I was so angry at God, I left the church when I thought I
would be unable to have children.
My children were the ones that drew me back to God. When they were in
nursery school, they asked to go to Sunday School like their friends. So, I
reluctantly went back to church. I
even took a job as the Christian education director at our church in Amherst,
and Don and I taught Sunday School classes. We were back to accepting the role
of “religion” in our lives. I still was wary of God, but
He was slowly softening my heart and drawing me closer to him. God brought me
to my knees time after time, but He never gave up on me.
It wasn't until we moved to Findlay in 1998 that I discovered what
it truly means to have a relationship with Jesus. The funny thing was, I thought I knew who God was. I thought
I understood the role of Jesus. So, it baffled me when I saw people walking
into our new church with Bibles and talking about Jesus saving them. I couldn't
understand what I assumed was a fanatical approach to church and religion. I
even questioned the pastor about it. He explained to me that I needed Jesus,
and the cross on which he died was like a bridge over the great divide between
Him and me. My sin was separating me from God. I finally asked God for forgiveness and accepted Jesus
Christ into my heart as my savior and Lord of my life.
When I turned my life over to Jesus, I had the peace that no matter
what I faced in the future, He would be in control of my life. He would
encourage me. He would sustain me. I was His daughter, and I would one day go
home to be with Him eternally in Heaven, where He had already prepared a place
for me.
My Bible is precious to me, because through God's word, I can see
how he has always had a plan for my life.
I have spent much time in His Word the past few years, especially after
I learned, yet again, that my battle with cancer was not finished. It was just
days before Easter of 2008 when I found myself in the emergency room with
intense pain in my chest. Doctors admitted me into the intensive care unit to
treat blood clots in my lungs. They also discovered breast cancer and
congestive heart failure – a result of the aggressive cancer treatments earlier
in my life. This time, I was able
to give the situation to God and trust that He would walk me through whatever
was to come. I was in His hands, and this was His plan.
Next, I underwent surgery to install a pacemaker, which doctors felt
would help me survive the next surgery – a lumpectomy. Although the tumor was
removed, doctors felt it was a matter of time before the cancer returned.
Still, God answered prayers and blessed me with more time. None of us knows the number of days we
have. Knowing that mine always had
the potential of being shortened, taught me to enjoy each moment.
I ended up back in the hospital again in January of 2010 with
pneumonia and a 35 percent chance of survival. Doctors predicted I wouldn't
make it. But, as all the family
gathered to say goodbye, I pulled through and went home again five days
later. God blessed me with nearly
three more wonderful years with the people I love, especially my four precious
grandbabies – each one a miracle.
In each circumstance, I know God gave me yet another miracle. Doctors really didn't know what to make
of me. According to statistics, I
should have died long ago. According to my medical chart, I should not have
been functioning like I was with so much energy. I never missed an opportunity to tell them that Jesus is the
reason for my peace, joy and strength.
There was no other reason than Jesus' miracles that I kept walking out
of those hospital rooms with joy in my heart and back to my life with family
and friends.
Facing cancer again with the joy and peace of Jesus in my heart has
been a totally different experience. It has drawn people to me, because they
have seen the change in my heart and they want to know its source. What a
blessing it has been to be able to tell them about Jesus. I believe that is why
God has given me the miracles I have had in the last four years. I pray my story of peace and joy in the
midst of trials will be an encouragement to others.
I am grieving that I have to say goodbye. I don't want to miss out
on any moment with the ones I love most. But, my prayer is that each of you
will find the peace and joy I have found in Jesus. I look forward to our
reunion again one day in Heaven. And, while I can't be here to encourage you in
your journey, know that I have loved you with my whole heart. I have confidence
that you will be blessed beyond measure in this life, and you will persevere
during times of pain and heartache.
I intend to be up in the bleachers in Heaven with “the great crowd of
witnesses” cheering you on. And when you miss me, think of me hosting story
time with all the children in Heaven, wearing pantyhose on my head while we
sing, “Do Your Ears Hang Low.”
2 comments:
Wow, what beautiful words!! She was a very special lady. To think of all the suffering she went through... But she knew the love of our Savior!! What a treasure these words must be to you now. I pray they are imprinted on your children's children. <3
A true testament to the power of a relationship with God. Thank you for sharing this with me. Your family is so blessed to have had her in your life's and to have this memory of her. God bless.
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